Halacha According to the Sephardic Practice: The Three Weeks – Part 1: Customs Starting from the Seventeenth of Tammuz

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28 Jun 2024
Fast of Shiva Asar B'Tammuz
  1. The days between the fasts of the Seventeenth of Tammuz and the Ninth of Av are called Ben HaMetzarim.[1] These are the days in which the enemies of Bnei Yisrael entered Yerushalayim and began to destroy the city, until the Ninth of Av, when they destroyed the Bet HaMikdash. Therefore, there are various customs of mourning that commemorate the tragedies that occurred on these days.[2]
  2. The customs that are observed on these days progressively become more restrictive as the days advance towards Tishah B’Av. These customs will be discussed in greater detail in the coming halachot. They are:
    1. From the 17th of Tammuz: We do not listen to music and do not dance; avoid reciting the berachah of shehecheyanu.
    2. From Rosh Chodesh Av: One should not build or move into a new home; we do not make parties or weddings; one may not repair clothing, and one should not buy new items.
    3. After Rosh Chodesh Av (not including Rosh Chodesh): it is customary to refrain from eating meat and drinking wine.
    4. During the week that Tisha B’Av falls out on (known as the Shavuah she’chal bo) – We do not do laundry; we do not wear freshly laundered clothing; we do not take haircuts or shave; and we do not bathe for pleasure – such as using warm water when showering.
    5. On a year when Tisha B’Av falls out on Shabbat, none of the restrictions of the Shavuah she’chal bo

Tikkun Chatzot during Ben HaMetzarim

  1. Many people have the custom to recite the daytime Tikkun Chatzot (Tikkun Rachel) during Ben HaMetzarim, which contain many verses lamenting the destruction of the Bet HaMikdash.[3]
  2. One does not say the daytime Tikkun Chatzot on erev Shabbat.[4] Similarly, one does not say it on erev Rosh Chodesh Av and Rosh Chodesh Av. The father of a baby who is having a brit milah, a sandak, and a mohel also do not say Tikkun Chatzot on the day of the brit milah. In general, whenever Tachanun is not recited, Tikkun Chatzot is also omitted. [5]
  3. The general custom is that one does not recite the daytime Tikkun Chatzot on erev Tishah B’Av; however, there are those who do recite it.[6]
  4. One does not have to recite Tikkun Chatzot in the afternoon of Tishah b’Av, since one has already spent the entire morning reciting Kinnot.[7]
  5. Even a Torah scholar who spends much of his time learning should try to recite Tikkun Chatzot during Ben HaMetzarim. However, he should not recite all the kinot; instead, he should only say the most important parts, which were established by the Arizal.[8]

Reciting a Shehecheyanu

  1. One may not recite the berachah of Shehecheyanu from the night of the seventeenth of Tammuz until the tenth of Av.[9] This is because one may not declare gratitude to Hashem for bringing us to these times, since the days of Ben HaMetzarim are sad days and times of judgment.[10]
  2. One should wait until Shabbat to wear new clothing or eat new fruit since, strictly speaking, one may recite a Shehecheyanu on Shabbat.[11] Some poskim, however, are stringent and refrain from doing so for Kabbalistic reasons.[12]
  3. According to some poskim, one may recite a Shehecheyanu over a new fruit on Rosh Chodesh Av.[13]
  4. One who accidentally made a berachah on a new fruit, which would require a Shehecheyanu, but did not yet bite from it, should recite a Shehecheyanu and take a small taste from the fruit to avoid a berachah levatalah.[14]
  5. A minor may recite a Shehecheyanu during Ben HaMetzarim.[15]
  6. One may recite a Shehecheyanu on a fruit that will not be found in the marketplace after Tishah B’Av, or if it will lose its taste if one will wait to eat it until after Tishah B’Av. However, one should try to wait for Shabbat to eat it.[16]
  7. A pregnant woman may eat a fruit that requires a SheHecheyanu during Ben HaMetzarim if she has a craving for it.[17] Similarly, one who is sick, even if he is not terminally ill, may eat a fruit that requires a Shehecheyanu. The reason for this is because by eating the fruit, the sick person broadens his appetite to eat other foods, which may help him feel better.[18]
  8. One may recite a Shehecheyanu on a pidyon haben or a brit milah, since it is a mitzvah that must be done at a specific time and cannot be delayed.[19]
  9. One may recite a Shehecheyanu when seeing a very close friend for the first time in thirty days.[20]
  10. While one may not recite a Shehecheyanu when wearing a new tallit during Ben HaMetzarim,[21] a chatan at his chuppah may recite a Shehecheyanu on his new tallit.[22]
  11. A boy who becomes a bar mitzvah during Ben HaMetzarim may not recite a Shehecheyanu on new clothing, even if he only intends to recite it for his new tefillin.[23]
  12. One may recite the berachah of HaTov VeHaMetiv during Ben HaMetzarim.[24]

Listening to Music and Dancing

  1. Dancing is forbidden beginning from the Seventeenth of Tammuz until after Tishah B’Av.[25]
  2. Even though the custom during the rest of the year is to be lenient and listen to music, during Ben HaMetzarim one should refrain from doing so. However, one may listen to music at a seudat mitzvah.[26]
  3. One may not listen to either live or recorded music.[27]
  4. One should not listen to music even if he is only listening when he is exercising.[28]
  5. One may listen to recordings of praises of Hashem, such as chapters of Tehillim with musical accompaniment in the background. Similarly, one may sing while learning Torah or while praying. One also does not have to be stringent when singing on Shabbat.[29]
  6. Strictly speaking, it is permitted to listen to acapella, but one should avoid listening to recordings that are upbeat and may cause one to dance.[30]
  7. Even children below the age of bar or bat mitzvah should refrain from listening to music,[31] unless they are below the age of chinuch, in which case, they may listen to music (for example, before going to sleep, or while in school).[32]
  8. One whose livelihood comes from playing music may continue to play music until the week of Tishah B’Av (shavua shechal bo).[33] Similarly, one who is a music teacher may continue teaching until the shavua shechal bo.[34]
  9. During a seudat mitzvah, such as a pidyon haben, brit milah, siyum mesechet, bar mitzvah, or sheva berachot, the Sephardic custom is to permit listening to music.[35] Ashkenazim, however, are stringent and do not listen to music even during a seudat mitzvah.[36]
  10. One may not play music at a brit Yitzchak (the seudah and tikkun that is performed the night before a baby’s brit milah).[37]
  11. An Ashkenazi who is attending the seudat mitzvah of a Sephardi does not need to silence the music. Similarly, if one is put on hold on the telephone and there is music playing, he does not have to hang up the phone, and if one is in a store or on a bus with music playing, he does not have to tell the owner to shut off the music.[38]
  12. One who is suffering from depression may listen to music to help improve his mood.[39]

Avoiding Danger

  1. The Chachamim warn that one should refrain during Ben HaMetzarim from several activities that may lead to danger. [40] These include:
    1. Walking alone from the beginning of the fourth hour of the day until the end of the ninth hour.[41]
    2. Walking between the shade and the sunlight (during the same times of the day as above).[42]
    3. Hitting children or students when disciplining them.[43]
  2. Preferably, one should not have a non–life threatening surgery performed during this time if it can be pushed off until after Tishah B’Av.[44]
  3. One may go to the beach and swim during Ben HaMetzarim, until the shavua shechal bo. However, one should be extra careful when doing so.[45]
  4. Some people avoid traveling on an airplane after Rosh Chodesh Av if it is not necessary.[46]

[1] In reference to the pasuk, Echah 1:3.

[2]. See Shibbulei HaLeket §263, which states in the name of Rav Saadya Gaon that these days are referenced in Daniel 10:3. See also Midrash Echah 1:3.

[3]. See the Chida, Moreh BaEtzba 8:229–230 and Yosef Ometz §21, which state that this is a very praiseworthy custom during this time. The point of the custom is to arouse one to repent and feel anguish over the loss of the Bet HaMikdash. He brings that this custom dates back to the time of the Arizal (see Pri Etz Chayim, shaar 23:1 and Shaar HaKavanot, p. 89). This custom is also brought by the Magen Avraham 549:4; Mishnah Berurah 551:103; and Kaf HaChayim 551:221. See Nechamat Tzion, p. 33, who explains why this should be recited specifically after chatzot. Customarily, only Tikkun Rachel is recited. See Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:6, which adds that one may say it during Ben HaMetzarim of a shemittah year. Even though Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 129, in the footnote brings the view of Maaseh Eliyahu §193, which states that one should not recite it during the shemittah year, Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 201, rules that it should be said.

[4]. Kaf HaChayim 551:224; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 5:6, in the footnote. See also Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 129, in the footnote, which brings the view of Maaseh Eliyahu §193, which states that one should not recite it.

[5]. Kaf HaChayim 551:223; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 129, in the footnote.

[6]. Even though Ben Ish Chai, Devarim 1:25 and Kaf HaChayim 552:63 state that one may say it on erev Tishah B’Av, the general custom is to refrain from doing so. See Pri Megadim 551:45; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 5:6, in the footnote and Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 252, in the footnote. However, Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim 6:2 states that one who has a custom to recite Tikkun Chatzot should say it both on erev Tishah B’Av and on the night of Tishah B’Av.

[7] Chida, Yosef Ometz 21; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 129, footnote 3.

[8]. See Yalkut Yosef, Hashkamat HaBoker, p. 174 and Halachah Berurah 1:1:3. See also Derech Sichah, vol. 1, p. 609 and Daat Noteh, p. 4, footnote 3, which states that Rabbi Chayim Kanievsky says Tikkun Chatzot in the middle of the day during Ben HaMetzarim.

[9] See Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 223, who says that it is proper to be stringent until the night of the 11th of Av.

[10]. Shulchan Aruch 551:17; Chayei Adam 133:2; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 129; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:3. However, Hagahot HaGra 551:17 holds that one may recite a SheHecheyanu. See also Piskei Teshuvot 551:53 and Binyan Av, vol. 1, 23:1 for more on this topic.

[11]. Magen Avraham 551:21; Mishnah Berurah 551:98. See also Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 132 and Yechaveh Daat 1:37, which state that there is a double doubt, a safek safekah, in this matter — maybe the halachah is like the view of the Gra (and possibly the Taz), who allows one to make a Shehecheyanu during Ben HaMetzarim, and even if it is not, maybe the halachah follows the view that holds that one may recite a Shehecheyanu on Shabbat. Furthermore, the Shulchan Aruch does not state this halachah as a prohibition during Ben HaMetzarim; rather, it only says that one should “be careful not to,” and therefore it is possible that one may be more lenient on Shabbat. See also Binyan Av, vol. 1, 23:1 for more on this topic.

[12]. Shaar HaKavanot 89c; Birkei Yosef 551:10; Chayim Shaal 1:24; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:3.

[13]. Shaar HaTziyun 551:98, in the name of Rabbi Akiva Eiger. See also Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 132.

[14]. See Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 138, in the footnote and Yabia Omer, vol. 2, Y.D. §5. See also Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 133, which adds that if one ate the fruit during Ben Hametzarim without reciting a Shehecheyanu because he forgot, he should eat another fruit that requires a Shehecheyanu after Ben HaMetzarim, and have the first fruit in mind.

[15]. Even though the Chida, Birkei Yosef 551:9 states that only a minor who does not know the difference between the days of Ben HaMetzarim and the rest of the year may recite a SheHecheyanu, Chacham Ovadia Yosef in Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 137, in the footnote writes that any minor may recite the berachah, since the whole custom is a stringency and not the letter of the law.

[16]. Rama 551:17; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 136; Yechaveh Daat 1:37. See also Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 131, which adds that since one can now store fruit in the fridge without it losing its taste, one should do so, and wait until Shabbat or after Tishah B’Av to eat it. See also Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:3, in footnote on p. 336.

[17]. The Chida, Birkei Yosef 551:8 and the Mishnah Berurah 551:99 state that she should eat the fruit without reciting SheHecheyanu. However, Kaf HaChayim 551:211 says that she may recite the berachah, and this is also the opinion of Chacham Ovadia Yosef in Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 138 and Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:3, in footnote on p. 336. See also Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 131.

[18]. See Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 138 and Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 131.

[19]. Shulchan Aruch 551:17. See also Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 135, in the footnote, which adds that the one reciting SheHecheyanu may also have in mind to eat a new fruit that is in front of him, and eat it after the brit milah or pidyon haben. See also Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 124 and Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:3.

[20]. Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 140, in footnote.

[21]. Igrot Moshe, O.C. 3:80.

[22]. Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:1, in the footnote,  p. 234, “V’Nireh.”

[23]. Halichot Shlomo, Ben HaMetzarim 14:2; Minchat Shlomo, vol. 2, siman 4, 33:3; Rivevot Ephraim, vol. 8, 390:16.

[24].. Moed LeChol Chai 9:24; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:4; Igrot Moshe, O.C. 3:80; Shmatata D’Moshe 551:30; Ashrei HaIsh, O.C., vol. 3, 68:12 & 20; Nitei Gavriel, Ben HaMetzarim 17:22; Kovetz Halachot, Ben HaMetzarim 5:2; Piskei Teshuvot 551:54.

[25]. Chayei Adam 133:8; Mishnah Berurah 551:16; Ben Ish Chai, Devarim 1:5; Kaf HaChayim 551:39.

[26]. Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 151; Yechaveh Daat 1:45; ibid. 6:34; Halichot Olam, vol. 2, p. 139; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:2; Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim 5:2. Ohr LeTzion points out that one may not listen to music on Rosh Chodesh Av either.

[27]. Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 151.

[28] Nechamat Tzion, p. 66.

[29]. Igrot Moshe, O.C. 1:166; ibid., O.C. 4:21; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:2; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 151; Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 116; Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, pp. 206, 210.

[30] Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 210. There are poskim who are stringent about listening to recorded chazzanut, such as the Tzitz Eliezer, vol. 15, 33:2; Ashrei HaIsh, vol. 3, 65:20; ibid., 68:5; Shevet HaLevi, vol. 8, 127:2; and Chut Shani, Shabbat, vol. 4, p. 379. Therefore, one should try to also abstain from acapella music that sounds like music itself. See also Nechamat Tzion, p. 66, who says that one who refrains from listening even to acapella is praiseworthy. See also Halichot Shlomo, ch. 14, devar halachah 5 and footnote 11, which states in the name of Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Auerbach that even though chazznut is permitted, if one derives pleasure from it and it puts him in a good mood, he is essentially defeating the purpose of not listening to music during Ben HaMetzarim. The intention of the prohibition is to help one focus on the loss of the Bet HaMikdash, and one should try not to distract himself from the meaning.

[31]. Igrot Moshe, O.C., vol. 4, 21:4; Ashrei HaIsh, O.C., vol. 3, 68:10; Nitei Gavriel, Ben HaMetzarim 15:1; Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim 5:2.

[32]. Emet LeYaakov, footnote 508, p. 124; also brought in Chazon Ovadia p. 158; Ashrei HaIsh, vol. 3, 68:10; Chut Shani, Shabbat, vol. 2, p. 325; Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 215.

[33]. Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 122:1; Biur Halachah 551:2; Ben Ish Chai, Devarim 1:5; Kaf HaChayim 551:39; Ashrei HaIsh, vol. 3, 68:9; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 156; Halichot Olam, vol.2, p. 137; Rivevot Ephraim 6:291. See also Kovetz Halachot, Ben HaMetzarim 4:6 and Nitei Gavriel, Ben HaMetzarim 15:3 & 6, which add that an Ashkenazi may even play music at a Sephardic wedding that takes place after Rosh Chodesh Av if that is his profession.

[34]. See Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 156; Igrot Moshe, O.C. 3:87; Shmatata D’Moshe, Shemuot Moshe 551:7, which state that one who needs to teach others in order to earn a living may do so. See also Tzitz Eliezer, vol. 16, 19:1; She’arim HaMetzuyanim BeHalachah 122:2; Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:2, in the footnote; Kovetz Halachot, Ben HaMetzarim 4:7; and Rivevot Ephraim, vol. 2, 155:2. See also Kaf HaChayim 551:41, which says that someone who is a music teacher should only teach songs that are relevant to Ben HaMetzarim. Rabbi Yosef Shalom Elyashiv, as cited in Ashrei HaIsh, vol. 3, 68:9, also writes that one should not review songs with the student, and should only teach him new songs.

[35]. Yechaveh Daat 6:34; Halichot Olam, vol. 2, p. 138; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 151; Torat HaMoadim, Ben HaMetzarim 5:4; Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 208. See also Kaf HaChayim 551:40.

[36]. See Shevet HaLevi 3:157; ibid., vol. 10, 81:2; Teshuvot VeHanhagot 5:167; Kovetz Halachot, Ben HaMetzarim 4:4; Orchot Rabbenu, vol. 2, p. 128:8; Ashrei HaIsh, vol. 3, 68:2; and Piskei Teshuvot 551:13.

[37]. Machazik Berachah 551:12; Gedolot Elisha 551:15; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 154.

[38]. See Ashrei HaIsh, O.C., vol. 3, 68:8, which says in the name of Rabbi Yosef Shalom Elyashiv that if one is waiting on hold with music playing, he does not have to hang up the phone. See also Sefer Nechamat Yisrael, ch. 2, n 38, which states in the name of Rabbi Chayim Kanievsky that someone who is on a bus with music playing does not have to shut off the music, even if one is deriving pleasure from it, as the Chachamim did not prohibit one from listening to music against his will.

See Shevet HaLevi 6:69, which cites She’arim HaMetzuyanim BeHalachah 126:4, which discusses listening to the radio (for permitted reasons such as) for the news or weather, and there are points during the broadcast when music is played. In such a case, one does not have to turn off the radio, since he is not listening to it for the music. Shevet HaLevi adds that even without this reason, it should be permitted, since the person does not even want to listen to the music. Another similar case is if one’s ringtone for his cell phone is a song. According to Rabbi Shmuel Kamenetsky, Kovetz Halachot, Ben HaMetzarim 4:12, one does not have to change the ringtone, since he does not intend for the music to bring him to dance. This is also the ruling of Rabbi Chayim Kanievsky in Teshuvot HaGrach, O.C. 230. However, it is brought in the name of Rabbi Yosef Shalom Elyashiv in Sefer Nechamat Yisrael 2:12 that one should try to change the ringtone. See also Ashrei HaIsh, vol. 3, 68:8.

[39]. Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:2; Nitei Gavriel, Ben HaMetzarim 15:9; Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 210.

[40]. This is because of an evil spirit called Ketev Meriri, which is permitted to inflict damage during these times. See Shulchan Aruch 551:18 and Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 126.

[41]. See Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 126, in the footnote, which cites Eshel Avraham 551:18, which states that since nowadays there are people around outside, there is no concern. However, when walking on the outskirts of a city, one should try to refrain from doing so. This is also the view of Aruch HaShulchan 551:39; the Chazon Ish in Dinim VeHanhagot 19:5 and as brought in Orchot Rabbenu, vol. 2, p. 129, 13; Rav Elyashiv in Ashrei HaIsh, vol. 3, 69:1; and Rivevot Ephraim 3:333. See also Piskei Teshuvot 551:56 and Sefer Shemirat HaGuf VeHaNefesh 135:2. See also Kovetz Halachot 7:1, which holds that one does not have to worry about Ketev Meriri nowadays.

[42]. Midrash Echah 1:29; Eliyah Rabbah §43; Mishnah Berurah 551:102; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 126; Shemirat HaGuf VeHaNefesh 135:6.

[43]. See Kaf HaChayim 551:232 and Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 126, which say that one should even refrain from hitting lightly.

Some poskim write that one should not do so throughout the entire day. However, some write that one should not do so only between the fourth and ninth hours. See Piskei Teshuvot 551:57 and Shemirat HaGuf VeHaNefesh 135:6.

[44]. See Shmatata D’Moshe, Shemuot Moshe 551:1; Tzitz Eliezer, vol. 12, 46:10; Ashrei HaIsh, O.C., vol. 3, 69:5; Kovetz MiBet HaLevi 13, p. 25, 8; Rabbi Yaakov Kamenetsky, Emet LeYaakov, footnote on p. 225; Shaarei Halachah U’Minhag, p. 172; Halichot Olam, vol. 2, p. 134; Chazon Ovadia, Arba Taaniyot, p. 128; Kovetz Halachot, Ben HaMetzarim 7:3; Nitei Gavriel, Ben HaMetzarim 23:8; and Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 244.

[45]. See Shmatata D’Moshe, Shemuot Moshe 551:4, which states in the name of Rabbi Moshe Feinstein that one should be careful not to swim in very deep waters. However, see Ohr LeTzion, vol. 3, 25:5, in footnote 5, which says that one may go swimming during Ben HaMetzarim since it is not one of the dangers that the Chachamim warned about, and we do not have to add extra precautions. See also Halichot Shlomo, Ben HaMetzarim 14:5, footnote 14; Ashrei HaIsh, O.C., vol. 3, 68:21; and Teshuvot VeHanhagot 2:263. See also Orchot Rabbenu, vol. 2, p. 129:12 and Derech Sichah, vol. 1, p. 609, which state that the Steipler forbade his children from going to the beach during Ben HaMetzarim since it is a time that is subject to many potential dangers. See also Shevet HaLevi 10:26 and Yalkut Yosef, Ben HaMetzarim, p. 195, which say similarly.

[46]. See Halichot Shlomo, Ben HaMetzarim 14:21.

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